My Cousins List
by TheGrandDisciple
Summary: J.D.'s cousins and their friends come to visit him at Sacred Heart which spawn a lot of mishaps and what will probably become yet another interesting week for J.D. and another goal for his cousin to become a better person. Rated for Crude Humor and Sexual Situations


**So This is my first cross over! Thought I'd Give it a shot! Two of the best shows that would've bee nawesome to have seen do cross overs! Please give me feed back on what you think! Enjoy!**

**A/N: Italics are Monologues**

"_Today was going to be a great day! Not because Elliot made me my favorite peanut butter, ketchup, scrambled eggs and toast mixed together in a bowl surprise. Not because Turk bought me a brand new pair of baby blue shower shorts complete with a baby blue shower wallet. Not even because Dr. Cox was nowhere to be found today. It's because my really cool cousin from Camden was coming to visit me here at the hospital!"_J.D. typical monologue begins for the day.

"Hey J.D. where's this cousin of yours?" Turk shouts and hugs J.D.

"Hey Chocolate Bear! He should be here soon. Any minute now!" J.D. replies.

"Oh God! You got cousins from Camden County? That's a hillbilly town! You know that right?" Carla chimes in.

"I'm sure they're still very nice Carla!" Elliot says in defense.

"Thank you baby!" J.D. says

"Even if they are crazy haired and bearded and smell bad." She finishes.

J.D. Looks at her confused before he sees his cousins come through the door. The first one is 6'1, with disheveled black hair, a black mustache, is wearing a white T-Shirt with a yellow unbuttoned plaid shirt over it, a black belt, blue jeans and brown boots. His brother is 6'3, husky, disheveled brown hair, a five o'clock shadow, wearing a dirty grey short, blue jeans and a pair of black tennis shoes.

"Hey guys!" J.D. shouts as he runs and hugs both of them.

"Hey J.D.! Look at you all grown up!" The one with the mustache says.

J.D. turns around to the gang and points at his cousin in the plaid and introduces him.

"Guys this is my cousin Earl Hickey in the plaid and the shy one is Randy Hickey!"

Carla starts laughing and walks away. Randy looks up and when he sees Elliot he hits Earls arm and calls dibs. Earl shakes his head and keeps meeting everyone. Randy sinks his head when he finds out that Elliot is J.D.'s girlfriend. But he suddenly perks up when he sees the Middle Eastern intern and calls dibs.

"_Randy's always had a problem with calling dibs. He never seems to pick the right girl. Like last year it was his boss's wife and even at one point it was Joy. But at least time the girl is single. Well at least according to J.D. she is. Then again he aint the sharpest tool in the shed._" Earl thinks to himself.

They go to check on J.D.'s first patient when suddenly J.D. gets near electrocuted touches a door handle. The Janitor comes out from behind the door and looks at J.D. while Earl checks on him and Randy stands in fear of the door.

"Oh my God! Earl! The door is possessed by the electric Gods and almost killed J.D. We should leave!" Randy shouts.

"No Randy it's not possessed. There's an exposed wire touching the handle on the other side. J.D. you alright?" Earl shouts and asks.

"I was wondering where I put that wire." The Janitor says in a serious but lying manner.

He then looks at Earl and his eyes grow wide. "YOU!"

Earl leans back, his upper lip lifts up and his eyes grow wide.

"_There's no escape from my list. There he was. Number18. Caused the local Taxidermist to have to go into Witness Protection. You see years ago, when I was still doing bad things, Joy was in the hospital after having Earl Jr. and I was still angry with. So to get some payback I went and slept with the first woman I could get drunk enough. Turns out that wasn't the best idea. She was the sister of Camden County's most notorious mobster. Jimmy "Frog Throat!" When she asked my name… I gave the taxidermist's name, Donald McGinley. I ended up giving her an S.T.D. and… well… when Jimmy found out he went and put a hit out on Donald and killed his pet squirrels. Causing Donald to be put into Witness Protection and my list."_

Earl shouts, "Oh Hell!" he takes off running. The Janitor chases after him with his mop in hand. Randy chases them to try and help Earl. When J.D. comes too, he follows shouting, "Wait! Cousin Earl! Randy! Wait!" The run past Dr. Kelso who just shakes his head and moves on.

They end up on the roof where the Janitor has Earl cornered.


End file.
